who said ‘resolve?’

Intention

Intention (Photo credit: turahbird)

R-E-S-O-L-V-E. Makes me think about the rug cleaning product that neutralizes odors and disappears stains, leaving only a strong smell that repels pets and humans alike. Sounds goal-oriented, rigid and efficient. An ultimatum, use-by date, finish line. In short, something to hang over my head, to battle, to fear, to ignore and perhaps, well, DISSOLVE. I feel my fists clench, jaw tighten, and shoulders elevate along with my heart rate at the mere sound of the word.

I need something softer, more organic, more consciously intentional. Not even quite resolution as in music, a harmonic relaxation of tension in preceding chords, although this is at least complete and very much there.

What I’m after is something to help me EVOLVE.  I want something altogether Other: neither disappearing nor ending harmoniously. I want something that has staying power, that moves me forward, has life and integrity, adds meaning to my days. Which brings me to INTENTION.

I like how many relevant words rhyme with it: attention, retention, invention. I like that it sounds somewhat esoteric. And mostly, I like that it gives me permission to be human in my endeavors to change things about myself that grieve me and my loved ones. In other words, when I forget my intention, nothing is lost. I have not failed. I have full permission to start over again. And again. And again. Which is a good thing, because I’m a notoriously slow learner and this kind of repetition helps create the habit for what I am intending.

English: Everything starts from needs or desir...

(Photo credit: Wikipedia)

My intention is always with me, something like that still small voice. Unlike conscience, however, it does not blare at me with outrage and indignation when I blunder. Rather, it continues its gentle, even tone underlying my decisions and actions. This is what I so love about INTENTION: it is a choice in every moment that sets the tone for my words and my actions. It shapes me gently without flagellation or recrimination. I can not fail. I can only pick myself up and keep on dancing.

5 thoughts on “who said ‘resolve?’

  1. Very nice, Sarah! I read a life coach’s essay (Martha Beck) who advised to keep the gentle voice in your head and shut off the recriminating one–it’s very interesting how we think that beating ourselves up will produce results and instead, it seems to drive us in the opposite direction. Intention is a lovely word and I’m all for anything that lets you (or anyone, me, for instance 🙂
    Keep on dancing!

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